So, this happened yesterday...
Before I get into the events of today, I need to give you a bit of background. Normally, our school morning look a little like this:
While hubby gets ready for work, I help our 9-year-old get ready for school. This typically involves making her lunch, reminding her what she needs to wear, keeping her on task while she talks a mile a minute, etc. (I work from home, so there's no real "getting ready" for me). Then, hubby comes downstairs and walks C to the bus stop.
But this morning was different.
Hubby had to go out of town for a meeting this morning, so C and I were on our own to get ready. Which is fine, we've done it before when daddy has to go out of town. I asked C to get her snacks out for lunch while I was tied up doing something else for a minute (OK, I'll be honest. I had to pee). It was in that moment that she said something that I think will change the way things happen around here from now on:
"I can just make my whole lunch myself, Mama."
Now, I know what you're thinking: That's great! She's growing up! And it is great. But if you're a parent, I'm sure you can also appreciate the bittersweetness of the moment. On the one hand, I'm happy she's growing in independence and wanting to do things for herself, but on the other hand.....
Where is the pause button?
Where did this little girl go?
Where is the magical button that allows me to push pause on her growing up, to keep her small for just a little while longer? I'm excited for all that the future holds for her, but the fact that she is starting to need me less and less for those everyday things also tugs at my mama heartstrings -- ya know?
Onward and upward I guess. I'm proud of the person she is and is becoming, I just at the same time want her to slow down a little and stay my little girl forever. No, that's not quite right. I want her to grow up and I want more than anything to be around to see it all, but at the same time...I don't know. I just feel like time is slipping through my fingers a little too quickly some days. Does that make sense? If you're a parent, I'm sure you know what I mean.
Incidentally, this morning she told Daddy she didn't need him to walk her to the bus. Heaven help me.....